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BY JENNIFER SILVERMAN
“Love to hate” is a ubiquitous expression for a reason. It’s out there in print, on film, and in conversation because it’s true.
We as a people love to hate.
We also tend to bestow respect and adoration on individuals whose behavior may be far more worthy of our condemnation rather than our affection.
Why is it that we frequently devote our undying love to the bad guys?
Many of us grew up watching Peter Pan. I adored the TV special featuring Mary Martin and replayed it so often the VHS wore out. Most of my childhood friends were enamored with either Peter, Wendy, or Tinkerbell. Not me. My man was the blood-thirsty, Captain Hook.
Why? I’m not sure. Perhaps it was his voluminous tresses, or his undeniable charisma, or his sheer determination. (Naturally, I also appreciated his crimson military-inspired peplum jacket with gold embroidery.)
The 1960’s sci-fi series, Lost in Space also comes to mind. It was a symphony of sixties fashion, teased hair, and a smorgasbord of extraterrestrials.
While most adolescents related to the children, Will or Penney, not me.
My fandom was reserved for Dr. Zachary Smith played by the one and only, Jonathan Harris.
Smith was on an evil mission from the get-go and selfish to the core. He was also endearing, hilarious, articulate, and such a captivating wimp that a kid couldn’t help but love him.
With a cast full of moral characters, why was I again drawn to the villain?
There must be a reason why so many teenage girls are smitten with the tough guy on the motorcycle and ignore the brainiac in the library. Maybe bad guys are so appealing because they’ve been glamorized.
Perhaps it’s similar to the perception of cigarette smoking back in the day. Even though folks were aware of the dangers of smoking, smokers were seen as sophisticated and cool.
Bad boys may look like James Dean on occasion, but they were not given their moniker in error.
On a more serious note, many of history’s greatest villains, some of whom committed deplorable, evil deeds, still have followers today.
Decades or centuries later, they inexplicably far outweigh even the vast quantity of "Swifties" around the world.
Of course, hate is all over the internet, and some of it is very close to home.
The neighborhood app, “Nextdoor” was apparently designed to connect neighbors.
Although I eschew most social media platforms, I do occasionally browse Nextdoor.
Despite the many positive examples of neighbors helping neighbors on the app, I’m regularly dismayed by the frequency in which posts accuse, attack, and blame.
Why do neighborhood updates or inquiries routinely morph into volatile dissension?
Maybe we can glean additional insight from one more classic TV series, Touched by Angel. In an episode I recently re-watched, Della Reese’s character, Tess uttered something profound: To paraphrase, “It’s easy to go from love to hate. It’s nearly impossible to go from hate to love”.
Hate breeds hate and negativity begets more negativity.
I don’t know that Captain Hook and Dr. Smith would have been so appealing to me had I not looked for the good in them. Real life bad guys are an entirely different monster (and not the Lost in Space extraterrestrial kind).
Perhaps we can make like Tess and not meet hate with hate – even when we love it.
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